Wife of an alcoholic

My husband and I have been married 15 years. We were happy, healthy, strong marriage and very much in love. One year ago, he tells me "I think I'm an alcoholic and I want to go to rehab". He selected the facility, entered into a rehab program voluntarily and was on the right track, so I thought. We had assets, owned a successful auto repair business, and money in the bank. He got out of rehab and bam!!! He was sober 90 days and hated it. We were doing AA meetings, sometimes together, I was attending Al A Non. I was doing all of the steps taught in Al A Non, including detachment. I always told my husband that I didn't care he was an alcoholic, it was a disease and I loved him in sickness and in health, for better and for worse. Then all hell broke loose in October when he started to go in and out of the hospital, detox, near death twice. This all took place between October and December. I finally just started getting angry. I started making the threats. We were losing money, we were losing customers and our financial situation worsened. He was lying about going to work, he was lying about drinking. Yet, throughout this whole thing he remained loyal to me and our marriage. He didn't want to lose his wife and the marriage. Things took a turn after the New Year where he started to come home later and later and the late night cell phone calls started. He would make his excuses of his whereabouts, etc. He would come home but he was always drunk. He would make the effort to be with me, be at home with me, do activities with me but there was a new tension between us that I couldn't understand. The professionals all would tell me its just part of the disease, detach. I tried. Finally, as of February, we lost the business, we have no savings left, no retirement left. He did find work in a garage where he worked 20 years ago!! Finally, one morning, as he layed in bed, I kissed him goodbye, told me he loved me, I told him I loved him and I left to work. That evening, he called late to tell me that he was in his new apartment. I was shocked. I asked if he was alone and he said "no". That was 2 weeks ago. He won't speak to me, he won't return my calls, he won't acknowledge me at all. He has gone to our home to retrieve his clothes, his dresser and a bed. This is a small town and rumor has it that he says he has found someone who is "nice to him" and "takes care of him, finally". He is living is a one bedroom apartment, as if he were 20 years old again, his new friend is also married. She is paying for everything. She paid to get into the apartment and is paying for all of the expenses, including new furniture, linens, dishes, gas for his vehicle, everything. Actually, its her husband who is funding everything but he has since cut them off. I am just devastated and don't know how he could just abandon me and our life overnight. HE says he warned me. There was never any warning. I guess the warning was his coming home later in the evening and the late night cell calls. They met at AA meetings about 9 months ago. He would always swear to me and tell be faithfully how he would never be with an alcoholic woman, how he was so much in love with me and loved me for my support of him and our strong marriage. Everyone tells me to let it go, not communicate with him, that relationship will end when the money ends, they'll fight, the grass is not greener. I'm not beleiving anyone and am finding this so overwhelming. I want him home where he's safe. We had been looking at options for treatment. He wants treatment but doesn't want to give up the alcohol. He's confused and I've been there to support that confusion and give him his time and space to figure it out. I have tried to do for me, take care of me, but with a watchful eye of him. He appeared to be heading on the right track but I guess not. I just feel so stupid and so scared of the future now without my husband. My 15 year marriage to my soulmate and best friend ended too abruptly. I just want to know if he'll ever talk to me, if he'll ever face me and if he'll ever regret what he's doing and come home. I'm devasted.